Oh Baby!

Some quotes on babies to brighten your day.
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies,who like to eat theirs. P.J. O'Rourke
Having a baby is like suddenly getting the world's worst roommate,like having Janis Joplin with a bad hangover and PMS come to stay with you. Anne Lamott
I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing,there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up,I want to achieve that state the old fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before. Ellen Degeneres
Babies aren't dishwasher-safe. Daniel Toth

In the Eye

It's not my intention to shame the people who choose to alter their appearance,even the ones that make some really poor choices. What I do want to understand is how any ethical plastic surgeon would continue to give injections into a person's lips when it has began to hinder the person's ability to eat. The gal in the following pictures is ready for even bigger lips,the 22 year old Hungarian wants to be sure she has the biggest lips in the world. She was lovely in the before picture.

Surprised?

Just when it seems like people are running short on stupid ideas someone always steps up to the plate. A 19 year old man decided to film himself doing what appears to be wetting his pants,then posting it with the hashtag "pee your pants challenge" believe it or not it took off with over 300,000 views and others posting film of themselves peeing their pants. The 19 year old from Kansas (who wants to become a TV writer) says he posted it as a parody of all the stupid challenges and can't believe anyone took it seriously. I can't believe it either,but then again I had trouble with the Tide pod challenge too and that was before the pandemic took hold and added to all the craziness.

Enforcers

In a controversial move the Grim Reaper made an appearance on a Florida beach in an attempt to show people the danger of their ways. Those same people thought it was disrespectful of those who had died or lost loved ones...well,duh that was the point he was trying to make,but hey,that's Florida. In the Philippines officials have been wearing Darth Vader/Storm Trooper outfits to enforce the quarantine and to hand out relief packages. I would say at this point whatever works works for me. Locally after a period of 19 days of no new cases it has flared back up to 11 which is higher than the original 7,show me to think maybe the end was in sight.

Two Birds With One Heap

Lund,a city in Sweden got creative about how to deter people from gathering in their central park to celebrate a popular holiday (Walpurgis Night) that usually draws tens of thousands. They are spreading chicken manure over the park which will not only make it unlikely that people will want to sit on the grass and drink beer but it will also organically fertilize the grass. Of course those living near the area will have to put up with the smell until it dissipates but COVID-19 will not be spread.

Don't Get Me Anything

Most mothers say something similar to their children whenever a gift giving holiday comes around though that usually doesn't deter a gift. Another common mother saying is,"I just want you (children) to be happy and healthy" which would be appropriate for this year. With those thoughts in mind here are a few less common gifts for this Mother's Day.

Pocket chainsaw

Kim Kardashian butt

Dog face mask

Cannabis leaf pasties 

Kimono with pocket for bottle

May,Maybe Maybe Not

Will this month be a turning point for the virus? Time will tell.
5/1 Lei Day
5/2 National Play Outside Day
5/3 World Laughter Day
5/4 World Give Day
5/5 Silence the Shame Day
5/6 Great American Grump Out
5/7 National Day of Reason
5/8 Student Nurse Day
5/9 American Indian Day
5/10 Clean Your Room Day
5/11 Hostess Cupcake Day
5/12 Limerick Day
5/13 Frog Jumping Day
5/14 National Decency Day
5/15 Endangered Species Day
5/16 National BBQ Day
5/17 Ride a Unicycle Day
5/18 I Love Reese's Day
5/19 National Scooter Day
5/20 World Bee Day
5/21 National Wait Staff Day
5/22 National Cooler Day
5/23 World Turtle Day
5/24 Brother's Day
5/25 Hamburger Day
5/26 National Chardonnay Day
5/27 World Otter Day
5/28 Slugs Return From Capistrano Day
5/29 Heat Awareness Day
5/30 Mint Julep Day
5/31 What You Think Upon Grows Day