Lend Me Your Ear

 Remember back in 1997 when Mike Tyson bit off a chunk of Evander Holyfield's ear in a WBA Heavy Weight Championship? Well Iron Mike has reinvented himself as a cannabis company,Tyson 2.0 and to further capitalize on his fame he sells marijuana edibles in the shape of an ear with a bite out of it,except for Colorado which doesn't permit the sale of edibles in the shape of humans,animals,fruit or any other shapes that could attract children so he is changing the shape to the letter T. Don't feel too bad for him since he knocks down around $653,000 per month from his pot business. 

Penguin Postmaster

 Right you are penguins rarely get mail,but being a postmaster in Antarctica isn't a full time job since they only receive about 80,000 pieces of mail per season,so monitoring the penguins is also part of the job description. The penguins are being observed as part of a conservation effort for the British Antarctic Survey with a report due at the end of the season. There is also an opening for base leader,shop manager and general assistant. Living conditions include limited power,no running water or internet access.I didn't find any mention of pay but it seems like it should be fairly high,applications must be in by April 25. 

No Fear/Anything for a Buck

 A 60 year old man in Germany isn't afraid of any stinking vaccine,in fact he has had 90 injections so he could sell the valid vaccine passports with real batch numbers to people who didn't want to be vaccinated. Kind of clever really for thinking up the scam and knowing that the vaccine deniers still wanted the mobility granted with the vaccine card but didn't want the shot so he saw the need and filled it. He would probably still be in business if he hadn't went back to the same place for a jab the next day. It is unknown what impact,if any,the multiple shots will have on the man's health. 

In a Jiffy

 Most people have heard or used the phrase,"In a jiffy" thinking it was an abstract way of saying they were almost ready without knowing that a jiffy is an actual measurement in fact it can be used to measure different things. A physical chemist defined jiffy as the length of time it takes for light to travel one centimeter in a vacuum. Physicists define jiffy as the time it takes light to travel one femtometer which is one millionth of a millionth of a millimeter. But wait there's more! An electrical engineer would describe a jiffy as the time it takes for a single cycle of alternating current,about 1/50 or 1/60 of a second depending on the electrical system. Who knew? 

Putting the Fun in Funeral

 An Australian man has an unusual sideline that he refers to as Coffin Confessor. In his day job he is a private investigator but has often found his clients seeking the truth as their health is declining which leaves them unable to use the information he had gathered. It started with one client who was dying of cancer so he suggested his client write his own eulogy but the man didn't think it would be read since it would reveal his wife's unfaithfulness with his best friend,so the man offered to crash his client's funeral and read his eulogy which also asked for 3 people to leave the service since they hadn't bothered to see him for the last 30 years. And a good time was not had by some,but hopefully the man will now rest in peace. The Coffin Confessor charges between $1,497 US to $7,485 though he never mentioned if he would travel for his work. 

Baby Bots?

 This is a bit on the creepy side and probably wouldn't be legal in every country then again things go on in the name of research that the general public doesn't always know about. Chinese researchers have developed a robotic nanny to nurture several animal fetuses with the intention of eventually growing babies in labs so women would no longer need to get pregnant. The process would also allow premature babies a better chance for survival by using a sealed bio-bag to simulate the womb. Maybe I just read to many dystopian  stories. 

Soon?

 This time of year usually finds me wishing for summer but taking into account the last several years wildfires,droughts and heat it doesn't seem like something to wish for. April is Alcohol Awareness Month,not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. 

4/1 St. Stupid Day

4/2 World Autism Day 

4/3 Fan Dance Day 

4/4 Vitamin C Day 

4/5 National Deep Dish Pizza Day 

4/6 Charlie the Tuna Day 

4/7 National Beer Day 

4/8 Buddha Day 

4/9 Jumbo Day 

4/10 National Farm Animals Day 

4/11 International "Louie Louie" Day 

4/12 Walk on Your Wild Side Day 

4/13 Scrabble Day 

4/14 National Pecan Day 

4/15 That Sucks Day 

4/16 Save the Elephant Day 

4/17 Blah! Blah! Blah! Day 

4/18 Nabisco Animal Crackers Day 

4/19 National Garlic Day 

4/20 National Cheddar Fries Day 

4/21 National Chocolate Covered Cashews Day 

4/22 International Mother Earth Day 

4/23 Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day 

4/24 National Pet Parents Day 

4/25 World Penguin Day 

4/26 National Pretzel Day 

4/27 Denim Day 

4/28 National Brave Hearts Day 

4/29 World Wish Day 

4/30 Adopt a Shelter Pet Day