Scurvy Scrimmage

The Europeans really know how to throw food fights, though while researching today's topic I found out that an annual tomato fight takes place every August in Reno,Nevada with benefits going to the American Cancer Society. The oldest of the food fights takes place in Ivrea,Italy where participants throw more than 500,000 pounds of oranges at each other over the course of three days. The festival dates from Medieval times when the towns people rebelled against a local tyrant,of course they probably threw rocks at the first affair and later beans were used,today the weapon of choice is oranges. There are nine teams who are divided into the tyrants guards and the townsfolk,the guards are the ones in the carriages,the townsfolk are on foot. I wouldn't mind watching this one,but it seems like being pelted with oranges might really hurt! The event takes place the three days before Fat Tuesday.

Flip Side

Today's post is about a woman who couldn't follow simple instructions unlike the man from yesterday who willingly followed bad instructions. The area for today's story is New Mexico,normally I don't hear about much weirdness from there so either they are well behaved or simply don't publicize their bad behavior. A 23 year old woman was found passed out behind the wheel of a black Volkswagen that had been reported for reckless driving. The officers woke her up and got her out of the vehicle,she smelled of alcohol and seemed extremely intoxicated. They gave her explicit instructions on how to walk a straight line but she tried turning cartwheels instead,giggling and falling and once accidentally striking one of the officers. Left with no options she was arrested and charged with aggravated DWI,battery and expired license plate.

Stockholm Syndrome?

It's hard to explain why else people would blindly follow the instructions of GPS units without question especially when the directions are obviously wrong. A 21 year old man was recently fined $425 for driving 2,624 feet into the Toronto,Canada subway system. Initially he fled the scene looking for help but later returned and explained he was navigating by his GPS. A spokesperson for the Transit System said there's lots of signage and flashing lights but other drivers had done the same thing in the past (makes a person wonder if the signs aren't that great or are the drivers more dependent on their GPS than their other senses?). Service was disrupted for several hours until a crane was able to remove the car. What can I say? at least it wasn't Florida.

Vengeful Squirrel

What is vengeful squirrel you wonder? It could be the name of a cocktail or maybe a rock band but it is what it sounds like,a vengeful squirrel. A Chicago politician who had been campaigning against the gray squirrels (my mom always called them grey diggers,and they are super destructive) who were costing the city over $1 million per year in damages by destroying the garbage carts literally had a run in with one of them. He claims it was a kamikaze/suicide bomber squirrel because it threw itself into the spokes of his bike causing him to wreck. He lost 5 teeth,his mouth was busted open and he ended up need facial reconstructive surgery...of course the squirrel lost its life in the attack. I'm not sure if the moral of the story is don't talk trash about squirrels or don't ride bikes in areas with large squirrel populations?

Further Proof

In case any of you were wondering why it seems like I single out the unfortunate drug dealers,thieves and other miscreants who seem to  find unique ways of conducting their various activities in the sunny state of Florida once again I defend my position,it isn't me, there is just something odd about that state. Allow me to present more evidence supporting my theory:a Volusia County Sheriff patrol car was spotted driving down the highway with a gas nozzle hanging from the side of the vehicle. The officer explained he was filling the tank when it started to rain so he got back into the vehicle,so far so good,then forgot to return the nozzle before driving off? Did he forget why he was stopped in the first place? The information officer announced the officer was in a hurry to get back to work and that it was a quick release nozzle so no gas pumps were harmed in the incident.

Get Your $h!t Together!

Are you ready for another exciting new app? This one will be released in March and it reminds me of a company I worked for who liked to keep close track of their employees. The app enables employees to find an empty toilet stall so they don't waste time trying to find one or waiting for one to become vacant. The app uses sensors installed on the stall doors to determine if they are in use. The sensors also notify an administrator if the stall is occupied more than 30 minutes in case there was an accident, but could also be used to monitor people who are using the bathroom to avoid work. So far the only planned use is for office buildings but if the app works well it may be put to use in sports stadiums,airports and other locations with high bathroom traffic. Gee,the second use almost sounds like it might be handy!

Catty Remarks

A comedian in the Los Angeles (California) area must have either a soft spot for cats or a really good heart because he obviously spent some time and thought on how to help the kitties at a local shelter get adopted. He made up  quirky name tags for the animals listing their likes and dislikes then stealthily left them off at the shelter. I think he has a great idea and it would be helpful in addition to the usual name and age information that is typically offered for the animals ready for adoption,plus it is really cute!

Camel Crack Ups

The days of crashing your camel and escaping without blame are quickly coming to an end. Iran has already issued over 100,000 personal registration numbers to camels and will eventually be assigning plates. Funny as it may seem (to me anyway) camels have been causing accidents,damages and losses to residents with no way to trace them to their owners so it makes sense in the same way that registering vehicles or licensing dogs leaves a avenue to find the responsible parties.

Door to Door Scam

Police in Connecticut issued a warning about suspicious males going door to door selling dairy products. The two offenders were caught after a brief foot pursuit and found to be lacking the proper permit for soliciting. The officers went on to warn against opening your door to any unfamiliar cattle...yes it was two cows who had walked out of a broken electric fence on a nearby farm,plus the electricity was off. The police herded the two back to their enclosure with no problems and gave them  a warning about future attempts of any illegal activities. I love Holsteins!

Working Like a Dog

I think with all the craziness in the world (Washington) that we can all use a feel good story,with that said I will proceed with today's post in a bigly manner.
A couple in Brazil bought a Shell gas station under construction and one day they found a frightened dog someone had left at the site. They took him to the vet,decided to adopt him and named him Negao. Once the construction was completed they gave Negao a job,complete with an employee badge and hat. His job is waiting for customers to arrive at which time he goes out to greet them,he is so popular that some people bring him toys when they come in. The station is open 24 hours so Negao is never alone and loved by his co-workers,he was recently named employee of the month.

Frosted Hair

Each February Canada's Whitehorse,Yukon Territory hosts the Sourdough Rendezvous Festival. The festival takes place from February 17th-26th and includes log tosses,ax throwing,flour packing competition and since 2011 a hair freezing contest. Participants in the hair freezing event jump into Takhini Hot Pools and mold their hair into frosted coiffures. If you are interested in seeing the event or even participating you may still have time this year as the hair styling takes place on the 24th. Good luck and stay warm!
  

Puppy Perks

BrewDog Brewery is the kind of company the world could use more of. The Scotland based brewer is fond of pets,people and beer and they believe that employee moral is more important than either having an anxious employee or living without a pet. They are giving their workers up to a week off when they need to settle a new pet into their home or when an existing pet is having health problems.  BrewDog started with two men and one dog in 2007,they now have over 1,000 employees and 50 office dogs. The UK is a pet loving country and other businesses are also beginning to offer paw-ternity leave. I don't see the trend taking off in the US anytime soon (other than with the BrewDog breweries that are setting up in various locations),most US companies are too production conscious.

Cheeto and the Clowns

I have some of my most lucid moments in the middle of the night and also some of the most demented,with that said I will proceed with today's post. Remember the Creepy Clowns making the headlines in 2016? I woke up thinking that they were either a preview/prediction of coming attractions or an attempt at distracting the masses from the real clown issue. Remember,"Lift and separate",no wait that's "divide and conquer",no that's not it either,but I will leave you with a Proverb to ponder (for those of you who may not recognize this,it is from the Bible). Proverbs 16:18 "Pride goes before destruction,and a haughty spirit before stumbling".