Naked Lunch

How about that,the UK is the subject of two posts in a row! The topic for today is a naked restaurant that opened a couple of months ago in London and was apparently an instant hit since the waiting list is now 46,000 names long. They don't require a person to strip down at the door but instead have changing rooms where you can put on robes and disrobe at your leisure,or not at all. Keeping with the natural theme the menu is organic and everything is served in earthenware dishes complete with edible utensils. The servers are also mostly naked wearing only very brief briefs and the surroundings are candlelit with bamboo screens to give diners at least an illusion of privacy. The only rules are no cell phones (I would be fine with that in all restaurants) and no photos. Around 80% of the patrons disrobe...think of the money a person could save in cleaning bills!

Good Gravy!

Those wacky Brits are at it again,more than 20 competitors gathered at the Rose 'N' Bowl Pub for the World Gravy Wrestling Championships. Sixteen men and eight women participated in the yearly event to raise funds for the East Lancashire Hospice. Apparently it isn't as much about wrestling as it is about costumes and funny wrestling moves with points awarded for entertainment. The wrestling takes place in a padded 14 X 13 foot area coated with Lancashire Gravy which from what I could glean is a gravy made from mutton grease.

Vertically Challenged?

I guess I will never understand the lengths people go to to alter their appearances. Limb lengthening surgery isn't new. A Polish man by the name of Ilizarov developed a technique in 1950 to help people who were born with one limb shorter or had been in an accident,he never intended the procedure to be used cosmetically,but that is exactly how it is being used today. A Florida doctor does around 650 limb lengthening surgeries a year at $85,000 a whack. Not only is it a high price to pay it is excruciating and takes around 3 months to add around 3 inches,oh did I mention it can also cripple a person?  I'm of average height so it is entirely possible that I am discounting the severity of being vertically challenged,but will stand by my opinion that I would not opt for it regardless of how tall I wasn't.



 

Bare With Me

Since it is Go Topless Day I thought I would put in my two cents worth on the topic. While I completely agree that women should be allowed to be bare chested in public just like men,I don't see it coming to pass in my life time. I'm not trying to discourage anyone who has taken on this particular battle but when a person considers the way breastfeeding mothers are shunned in public places even when they are covered it makes the topic of going topless as a choice seem highly unlikely whether it is fair or not. There are supposed to be demonstrations in 56 cities around the world today and a song was written for the occasion (titled "Go Topless Go"). Personally after 60 odd years of keeping my chest covered I don't think I would ever be comfortable going topless,but if you are so inclined have at it!

Cell Phone Attachment

Even if you don't think you have an abnormal attachment to your cell phone you are likely to make sure you don't become overly attached after reading today's post. In a small town just outside Oslo,Norway a man dropped his cell phone in an outhouse and oddly enough was able to convince his friend to go in after it when attempts to retrieve it with a stick failed (he must have been a REALLY good friend).  It wasn't mentioned if alcohol was involved but for some reason neither of the friends considered the gravity factor when planning his exit and lo and behold he couldn't get back out. Picture if you will being trapped with feces up to your thighs and if that isn't bad enough the toilet hadn't been emptied in a month and the 20 year old man thought animals were bumping into him. You can imagine his relief when a four man fire crew arrived and cut his way to freedom. I don't know about anyone else but if I had been in that situation there would be no way I would want the phone back...imagine holding it to your face to make a call. Nope,I'll pass.


 

Coneheads

I have fond memories of the SNL Coneheads but today's post is about a different type of conehead. The coneheads I'm referring to today are two 14 year old inventors/entrepreneurs who at the tender age of 10 came up with an idea to put an end to the mess associated with ice cream cones. The Denver (Colorado) duo also took second place at the statewide Gates Invention Program in 2011 and were granted a patent last year. They also were the youngest entrepreneurs to appear on Shark Tank without an adult after being selected from 50,000 applicants,the Sharks were impressed. So without further ado let's see what these boys have for the world.

Pirate Patrol

A couple of days ago I was watching a DVD and finally remembered to make a note to myself to find out when (the short answer is 2012) and why the Department of Homeland Security became involved in the war on movie piracy. Even after reading several articles about  why DHS became involved I'm afraid I can't endorse their involvement. First of all let's face it they aren't exactly good at their primary goal. How many times have DHS made mistakes that could have proved fatal in providing security for our homeland,the answer is too many to list in any short space. I would like to think that the government's involvement in protecting the movie industry is more than paid for by the taxes paid by the stars and the studios,but again how many times do you read about stars who aren't paying taxes and we all know big business has so many loopholes they end up paying way less than their fair share. The reason given for the war on piracy is the financial gains made from the piracy are used for terrorism. Really? I fail to see a connection.

Buddy Can You Spare a Pig?

In the midst of all the craziness it is time for a story with a somewhat happy ending and it happened in Oregon of all places! The Newport Police Department found a pig wandering loose in the streets and posted a picture/message asking if anyone had lost a pig and also stating that it wasn't a cop/pig joke. They were hoping no one would claim the pig as they wanted him to be their mascot,giving him the name Mr. Boombastic before turning him in to the Lincoln County Animal Shelter. The owner came forward to claim ChalkO so the Newport Police are now officially looking for another pig for their mascot. If anyone knows of a pig who needs a home they are asking the public to contact their non emergency number (541-265-6610).

Tastes Like Chicken

The new nail polish KFC introduced back in May did taste like chicken and was supposed to be finger lickin' good, but why? Are they encouraging people to chew their nails? I guess they are just testing the waters for further expanding their product line because earlier this month they offered 3,000 free bottles of their "Extra Crispy" SPF 30 sunscreen which smells like chicken but is not edible. There are definitely worse smells than fried chicken but personally I don't want smell like KFC neither in  nor out of the sun. It was never stated for certain if they plan to continue producing either product or if it was just a one time gimmick though I'm not certain how either item would boost sales.

Cut the Crap

The 29th of last month I posted a piece about an ongoing problem with someone defecating on a Norwegian golf course which I found slightly humorous. Today's post is about a similar serial pooper only this one is disgusting in their choice of venue. A children's playground in South Arlington,Virginia has been targeted 4-5 times in the last year,and if that isn't bad enough the person does this around the playground equipment not in the bushes,plus the fecal matter is then covered by a T-shirt to make sure someone gets a surprise when they look to see what is under the shirt. Police are working with the Parks and Rec Department and "it" will no doubt hit the fan when the culprit is apprehended.

An Acquired Taste

The compulsion to eat non food items is referred to as pica which comes from the Latin word for magpie. Sometimes the things being ingested such as dirt or mud are actually being consumed because of dietary issues,but that doesn't always apply. A 42 year old man in India was admitted to the hospital complaining of abdominal pain and weakness. The doctors did an ultrasound which revealed a mass in his stomach. It took five surgeons five hours to remove 40 knives which the man had swallowed over a two month period. After he survived the surgery the man explained that he had an uncontrollable urge to eat knives and he liked the way they tasted. Tasted? I don't know about everyone else but I have never noticed cutlery having a flavor. It is clear to me that this man needs to move to Florida!

Junk Mail?

When I read about today's topic I was first reminded of Cliff Clavin from "Cheers" but then I decided that Cliff did mostly deliver the mail he just spent a lot of time in the bar. Then I remembered it was Newman from "Seinfeld" who rented storage for the mail he didn't deliver. Not to be outdone by TV personalities a real life postal carrier in (of all places!) San Carlos Park,Florida decided the best way to deal with mail, other than actually delivering it, was to take it directly to a dumpster and call it task completed for the day without any pesky middleman. The carrier may have been getting away with her scheme for some time before the owner of the pizza parlor noticed a dump on the security camera. When the dumpster was checked there were hundreds of pieces of mail of all kinds,not just junk mail. The post office came and picked up the mail and a copy of the video footage. There was no mention of what type of disciplinary action would be taken against the carrier,but hey it is Florida after all!

New Type of I Pad

Are some of you thinking I'm not aware of how iPad is spelled?  Actually I was going for cute but may have missed my mark. The Hannahpad is a feminine hygiene product being manufactured by a couple in Melbourne,Australia. It is a reusable 100% organic cotton  pad which is washed after use, comes in several sizes,lasts 2-3 years and costs $14.99 for the panty liner size up to $35 for the super-ultra overnight pad. While the thought of having to wash the pads might not be appealing the saving over time would be substantial and no more chemicals to cause problems,not to mention filling the landfills with the waste of the disposable pads. I'm not sure how this product will sell but it seems like a step in the right direction.

Paraphilias

Today's post started innocently enough with a man in Dayton,Ohio (not Florida!) caught trying to have sex with the grill of a red van. I thought to myself this must be an entertaining if slightly sick piece of weirdness, perfect for my blog...then things took a turn for the weirder. I decided there must be a name for having sex with inanimate objects and when I looked that up I discovered even more sick and twisted sexual objects. Turns out having sex with vehicles is fairly common though the exhaust pipe is the usual object of affection. Other items sought out for the purpose of pleasure include:an inflatable pink pool raft (not in a pool) also in Ohio,an abandoned yellow couch (ewww),metal picnic table,park bench,street signs,gumball machine,multiple parts of bicycles,a jar of pasta sauce,a cardboard cutout of a sunglasses model and a laundry basket. In a couple of instances emergency services had to be called for help disengaging. Inebriation was often involved.

Man who was involved with the red van

Cluck Truck Runs Amok

In an ironic twist of fate a semi truck lost part (4 crates) of its load in front of a KFC in a suburb of Melbourne,Australia. Local police were called to help wrangle the chickens back into their crates,it wasn't mentioned if there were any casualties. A representative for KFC said the chickens were not destined for any KFC facility and went on to say they were supplied by the three largest chicken suppliers who have high standards of the bird's welfare and comfort. I thought that sounded pretty holier than thou considering that a couple of years ago PETA was all over KFC about the inhumane treatment their chickens endured but what do I know?