Gag Me!

Fair warning! if you are a queasy person you should skip today's post,it is not a particularly pretty picture. Seems odd to me that this is actually considered art but from what I have read recently about various forms of performance art I am apparently way behind what is the current rage. A 27 year old woman creates her art by drinking a selection of dyed soy milk then vomiting it onto a canvas. She says the key is to fast for two days prior to each performance to clean any food from her stomach. The day of the creation the colors must be swallowed and regurgitated at intervals as to not mix in her stomach. Her work began in 2005 and has gained success from a Lady Gaga video where she is featured vomiting on the pop singers dress. Ripley's Believe it of Not has also featured her work. Since I have long hair I am compelled to wonder why she doesn't tie her hair back when she is working?

Sorry

No real blog today,the time I usually take to work on the post du jour was hijacked by a partially disabled friend with a partially disabled vehicle that needed a ride to the library. I don't think I would ever deny a person a ride to the library...unless they had really treated me badly at some point. Back tomorrow,or at least that is the plan.

A New Twist

When a person thinks of vandalism the first things that come to mind are usually spray paint,keyed cars,or maybe toilet papered houses and yards. For the last six weeks in Hillsboro,OR it has been vandalism by pastry. Maple bars smeared on cars,doughnuts on windshield wipers,yogurt,cakes,eggs and in one incident potato salad. The police think it is kids,but how many kids do you know who wouldn't just eat the doughnuts? plus if it is kids where are they getting the money for the pastries and other assorted food items? It seems to me they might have better luck checking the area for disgruntled deli employees...of course a teenager could have a summer job at a deli and feel the need to rebel against the work concept. It seems like there is a fair amount of that going around it the teen community.

Making Friends

A 64 year old Japanese woman returned to her childhood village about 11 years ago to find it populated with only 37 people, considerably less than a once thriving area with a local company to supply employment. She decided to replace those people who had moved or died with Cabbage Patch Kids style dolls. In the last 10 years she has made around 350 dolls. A documentary called "Valley of the Dolls" interviewed the woman about her "hobby" and she said,"I only think about the dolls." "They are like my children." The dolls are depicted doing everyday activities,sitting on a bench,waiting for a bus,having weddings,going to school,fishing and gardening to name a few. Sounds mostly harmless...seems mostly weird.

Funny Criminal Names

Crime is never a laughing matter,but some of the names that match their crimes can be quite amusing.
One would think that after six drunk driving arrests a person would know better (even drunk) than to drive down the road the wrong way,but wait it gets worse,she smelled of booze,had a bottle of vodka on the seat next to her,and showed the officer the receipt for the booze...her name? Brenda Drinkwater!
In Ottawa,Canada (yes they have perverts there too!) a 62 year old man was arrested in April of this year for exposing himself. His name? Donald Popadick. Another accused flasher had the name to fit the crime...Daniel Noody.  A man arrested on drug charges in Florida named Edward Cocaine,with a surname like that did he ever have a chance? Enjoy your day!

Divine Justice

No matter what your opinion on death sentences sometimes things just turn out right. Back in 1989 a convicted murderer won an appeal to avoid the electric chair to serve life in prison instead. One of the comforts offered on death row are TV sets and his wasn't working so he seated himself on the metal commode to go about fixing it. He bit down on a wire in the plugged in TV and you guessed it! he electrocuted himself. Justice served,end of story.

Rearranging

I am to the point of needing new living room furniture,I haven't actually shopped for it yet but I was thinking something cat proof would be nice. I mention this because earlier in the week the news ran a piece on Roombots furniture. I am certain I won't be purchasing this robotic furniture which moves,self assembles and self re-configures. A one time stool can change itself into a chair,or table,a set of chairs can connect to make a sofa. The idea is for assistance to the elderly or disabled and is designed to be multifunctional and assistive. In my opinion it is a nightmare...imagine getting up from a nights sleep and entering a room only to trip over something that rearranged itself during the night. I had a sectional sofa years ago and didn't care for it at all,so Roombots are definitely not on my short list.

The Finish Line

It is not my intention to encourage divorce,but for anyone who might be heading in that direction The Divorce Hotel may be an option to consider. The concept was brought to life in 2011 and now has 20 locations in the Netherlands with negotiations in progress at several hotels in New York and Los Angeles. The program offers a weekend divorce arranged by a team of professionals,the charges range between $3,500-$10,000 depending on the complexity. When the couple leaves the hotel all that is left to do is present their papers to a judge. In case you were wondering the couples sleep in separate rooms.

Keep an Eye Out

Another serendipitous happening to report today, I am reading a book about a man and his seeing eye dog who worked in Tower 1 of the World Trade Center on 9/11 and managed to make their way to safety from the 78th floor,then I happened across an article about a seeing eye cat who helped his blind dog companion navigate...but wait there's more! Not only was there a cat who guided his canine friend,there are multiple cases of cats as seeing eye guides for people. Life magazine featured a story in 1947 about a woman and her Persian seeing eye cat. More recently a man who lost his sight due to diabetes in 2003 and his cat who guides him around the house by meowing at him. I was pleased to find some cats stepping up to the plate other than at feeding time! My two cats are more the type to expect me to look out for them,that or they are purposely trying to trip me so they can feast on my crippled body once their diabolical plan succeeds!

When Pigs Fly

Not many people claim to remember the 1960's,I was in high school but can't recall much more than that,for instance I didn't remember that the Yippies nominated a pig for president at the 1968 Democratic National Convention in Chicago. He was 145 pound male named Pigasus. His campaign pledge:"They nominate a president and he eats the people. We nominate a president and the people eat him." Pigasus' candidacy was cut short when his backers (The Chicago Eight,who later became The Chicago Seven) were arrested. The humans were later bailed out but Pigasus' fate remains unknown. I would say it's time to run a farm animal again,but that has happened on several occasions since the 60's!

Keeping Cool

To refrigerate or not to refrigerate,that is the question. Most people have their own ideas about what needs to go into the fridge and what can stay in a cupboard but there are a few items that change with refrigeration and not in a good way. Potatoes should be kept in a cool dark place,but not the fridge as it causes the starch to turn to sugar and also changes the flavor. Onions need no refrigeration but should not be kept with potatoes as the gases from potatoes make the onions rot. Tomatoes should be stored at room temperature as cold breaks down the cell walls making them mushy and mealy,same with uncut melons which brings me to my point...the reason I haven't been able to get a good melon for years is because all produce comes to this area on a refrigerated truck!

The Name Game

On occasion I like to take a look at weird names,the results this time not only include birth names (abuse or cruelty?) but also people who changed their names for reasons that must have seemed like a good idea at the time. First on the list is a baby whose parents thought it would be cute to be named after an illicit drug (ketamine) her full given name,Urhines (your highness) Kendall Icy Eight Special K. The Golden Palace internet casino paid $15,000 for a baby to be named in its honor,the result,GoldenPalaceDotCom Silverman. A member of PETA changed his name to KentuckyFriedCruelty.com to protest animal abuse by KFC. A young Javanese man is named after two superheroes,Batman Bin Suparman. Last but not least,Dick Assman of Canada who claims his name is pronounced uzman.

The Butt of the Joke

If you are into rodent butts you're in luck! There are three books dedicated entirely to hamster butts,and for those of you not willing to wait for a book there is a Facebook page featuring the south ends of the furry critters. Apparently the craze started in Japan where fans coined a word for it,Hamuketsu, which combines the Japanese words for hamster and butt. The books are coffee table type books,the first two books sold around 40,000 copies, the third book came out the end of May and I was unable at this time to find information on the sales for that book. Aficionados prefer male hamster butts as they are bigger and rounder!

Freeze Frame

I recently read an article on cryopreservation and was surprised by the prices. Considering that a human has yet to be reanimated maybe the prices aren't all that reasonable? The costs range from $12,000-$70,000 for neuro (head) only. My first question was what is the idea behind that? If you were never pleased with your first body maybe your head could be attached to a body more to your liking? or would just your head be reanimated and have no body? The prices for your entire body cryopreservation start around $200,000 and go up from there with various fees added on. People are signing up for life insurance policies intended for the purpose of cryopreservation,the largest company has frozen 124 people so far. It seems to me that a person would have to be really afraid of dying to sign up for this process,seriously,how would you react when you woke up say in 1,000 years in the future? You would have to start your life over and have immeasurable catching up to do with a body that had seen better days...nope,I'll take another pass.

The Itsy Bitsy Spider

I have nothing against spiders and don't understand why many people fear them,but I had no idea that there were show spiders and spider shows. The most prestigious,best attended and oldest (29th annual in 2014) is the British Tarantula Society Exhibition. This year it attracted over 30,000 tarantulas and their keepers from around the world. In case you're curious how to tell a show quality spider from a regular spider here are some guidelines: a glistening coat (freshly molted adults will look their best) coloring,correct proportions,alert and active,and stance,all eight legs should be upright and perfectly poised. I don't think there are any unusual spiders in this area but I have noticed that some spiders are a lot better looking than others,though I doubt I will be attending an exhibition in the near future.

Bloody Ridiculous

Just another procedure for those people vain enough to indulge their ego with yet another cosmetic treatment. This one is known as the vampire facial,or PRP Injection Therapy. The procedure takes blood from the patient (10 cc) and using a centrifuge separates the blood to obtain platelet plasma. The plasma is then injected into the targeted facial areas. The cost of the procedure is around $1,500 and is only recommended for people in their late 30s and early 40s. I guess the first red flag for me on this treatment was the name "vampire facial",but I would still opt to look my age rather than deal with the needles involved.

Little Surfer

This past Sunday (7/13) was one of the two Dog surfing competitions held in San Diego,CA. The recent event was the 9th annual,  sponsored by Petco with proceeds going to the San Diego Humane Society. The events are divided by the size of the dogs competing: small,medium,and large followed by a tandem division. The second competition is called Surf Dog Surf-A-Thon and is still coming up in September (9/7/14). This years event will introduce the Paddle Paws Parade,a paddle board parade for dogs and owners. The proceeds go to a local pet rescue group,The Helen Woodward Animal Center. The dogs all wear life vests and for the most part seem to enjoy the activity.
 For anyone wondering the status of the Tillamook mini buses from yesterday's post,they were found in a self storage area about 50 miles east of Sacramento.

Cheesy

Okay California,give back our Tillamook Baby Loaves! In all fairness it may not have been a Californian who stole the three VW mini buses,however it did happen near Sacramento so it seems likely it may be someone from the area. The stolen mini buses are model years 1959,1964,and 1966. They have Oregon license plates YUM4,YUM5,and YUM6 and are painted the color of Tillamook medium cheddar cheese. The words Baby Loaf and Medium Cheddar Cheese are painted on the side. They were brought to the area as a promotion dubbed the Loaf Love Tour. The truck and trailer carrying the buses was found burned and abandoned. Tillamook is offering a reward of $10,000 for the safe recovery of the vans.

Spuds

I ran across one of my notes to myself about rubbing sliced potato on your underarms in place of deodorant,everything I found about this supposedly natural deodorant said after using the potato to apply your regular deodorant, so I failed to see the point of using the potato. I did find several other interesting uses for potatoes,though I think my number 1 use will remain eating them,everyone loves the versatile potato. I'm not sure how practical some of these uses are,but you can be the judge of that. Rub a potato on ski goggles or glasses to prevent fogging (seems like it would leave them smeared). As a beauty treatment rub a cut potato on your face,leave it on for a minute and rinse. To relieve tired puffy eyes place potato slices on closed eyelids. To remove berry stains from your hands rub them with a raw potato. To revive old beat up shoes that no longer shine rub with a potato then polish,they will shine like new again. Does anyone else crave potato salad?

Ratting

Most people know that teasing the hair was at one time referred to as ratting the hair,but what is the story behind that? The whole of the matter goes back to Louis XV and his mistress Madame de Pompadour. Until this time there were no hairdressers,only wig makers. The French Court would throw elaborate theme parties and women started hiring artists to create hairstyles (more like sculptures) depicting the theme of the parties. The hair was placed over a frame then stuffed with cotton,wool or straw and then cemented in place with a paste. The pastes used were made of beef lard or bear grease. Because of the expense the hairdos were kept in place for a week or two,giving the paste time to become rancid and attract vermin while the women slept,giving birth to the term "rats nest" as related to hair.

A Girl Can Dream

Those of you readers who know me also know I am prone to really strange,vivid dreams. I've always had dreams like that for as long as I can recall. I recently read about a man who narrated his dreams and his roommate recorded them making them into an album,I wasn't overly surprised to hear that someone would not only talk in their sleep but tell the dreams they were having as I am well versed in the weird/humorous things a person can dream. A couple of examples of his narrations include his organization of a mustard battle,he is apparently discussing where the killing spot will be and decides on the forehead...no the hair won't count. In another he is watching his house being blown away and begs the mailman to stop it,but the mailman is broken. The one I found most frightening was playing roulette with poisoned eclairs,I'm not sure why it scared me because as far as ways to die it doesn't sound too bad.

Cluck-a-Doodle

Around a month ago I posted a piece about businesses offering chicken rentals The rentals included the coop,chickens and food and were initially meant to last over the summer months. It was an expensive way to start raising chickens but it did offer the experience to people who had never been around chickens without the commitment of becoming a full time chicken custodian. When I recently came across the Ayam Cemani aka Lamborghini of Chickens I thought back to that blog and decided that a rental chicken would be the way to go since these all black birds (including flesh and organs) sell for $2,500 per bird. At that price they wouldn't be ending up as dinner any time soon,and if the rental rate was right you could enjoy their exotic company for a few months without actually buying the bird. I didn't find any mention of what kind of eggs the birds laid,but regardless of the color of the shell I am guessing the contents would be similar to a basic egg.

Which Came First?

Ah yes,that age old question,but what if a chicken could regress and turn itself into an egg? There is a jellyfish that has the ability to age backwards,and it can do it over and over. This jellyfish was first discovered in 1883 but the age reversal didn't become apparent until the 1990s. The immortal jellyfish typically reproduces and lives its life (and death) in the normal way but when starvation or injury threaten instead of dying it transforms cells into a younger state. When the aging is reversed the cells are completely transformed or swapped into different types of cells,a muscle cell may become a nerve cell or whatever cell is needed as the age is reversed.
Okay,here is the kicker you regular readers may have been anticipating...instead of billions of research dollars and mass quantities of scientists studying this amazing and possibly life saving creature there is one 60 year old man in Japan who is studying it on his own. Enough to make a person scratch their head isn't it? One researcher speculated that since the jellyfish is so small (about the size of the fingernail on your little finger) it hadn't attracted more attention as routinely it is the larger creatures that attract studies.